Hey Everyone!!!!
I've been working on all my final papers for my senior college classes but I've got a whole bunch of really great posts coming your way soon!!!!
STAY TUNED!!!!
April 26, 2014
April 13, 2014
From Plain to KINKY: My Hair Journey
As I write this I'm on a all time high. I'm graduating from college in a month and my hair is looking fabulous. I've been working on a series of hair seminars at my campus due to underclassmen always asking me for advice. I wanted to take this time and space to talk about my journey from plain to kinky which is how my hair made me feel at different points in my life.
I was born into a West Indian family with the land name of "The Wolf Pack". Why?…because everyone in my family had hair for days. When I was 4 and 5 years old, I like my mother had massive amount of hair that cascaded down my back. I loved how long my hair was and remembered my dad making jokes about my uncle having hair like mine and pressing it for picture day before he sweat it out on his way to school. Everybody loved my hair. My mother however decided she wanted to put a texturizer in her hair to make the curls hang. Essentially she wanted 3c and didn't like our 4a hair. My mom got to a point where she didn't like doing my hair even though it was only once a week. One day we saw a just for me "kiddie perm" commercial and my mom asked me if I wanted my hair to be straight like the little girls hair and I said no I like my hair. My mom was persistent on how much easier it would be to comb my hair and all those age old tales mom's use to convince their daughters it's better. Everyone in my family was against it because in my family hair belongs to the individual not the parents…unless of course you're trying to do something insane. So after that first relaxer it was completely downhill for my hair. The more my mother became obsessed with straight hair the more mine suffered.
Between the first relaxer and the time I got to the 6th grade my hair was 80% shorter than prior to the relaxer. My hair was shedding all over the place and I knew nothing more than my life norm of getting relaxers to straighten my hair. After being harassed halfway through my 7th grade year, my mom's hairdresser cut my hair into a bob to give it some length but then it went right back to breaking off. I felt so plain like I blended in with all the other black girls I went to school with because there wasn't a single girl with natural hair. When I was finishing Middle school I made a bet with my parents that for 12 months I would leave my hair alone and just let it grow out. I went an entire year with braids and Senegalese twists. This really helped me out because I had dance rehearsal 3 days a week and no time or motivation to keep doing my hair. By the time my annual recital came around, I was at the end of my bet with my parents...it was my first time being totally natural since I was 5 years old. I was so obsessed and in love with my hair; it made me feel alive and gave me a since of me as individual...although I was only 15, how would I possibly know who I was as a person anyway. My thinking was that people would be accepting of my hair because I was still me just more free than I was with straight hair; however, my classmates looked at me and squawked at me like I was breaking the norm which I was. The status quo was to have relaxed bone straight hair if you're a black girl and the only girls with curly hair were the Spanish girls. I had none of the knowledge I have now about caring for natural hair; I definitely didn't know about the humidity factor when straightening hair in the summer -_____- After being harassed I tried pressing it one morning before school and it was swangin and as the day went on everyone looked at me sideways and then I went to the bathroom and saw my hair was back to its Afro. I felt amazing about my kinky hair when I was home but the butt of every joke outside my house. Later that year going into my junior year I ended up relaxing my hair because I couldn't deal with being scrutinized by my family and classmates. I went from feeling like superwoman to feeling plain as hell. And once again my hair started breaking off worse. I wasn't bald or nothing but it broke so bad and i had that awkward breaking spot where ponytails usually sit.
When I got to college my hair was the same as when I left high school...crappy, damaged, and short. At one point I couldn't afford a relaxer so I kept growing my hair out and eventually my hair was natural all over again until my family started complaining about it looking "gross" although I was taking great care of it. It wasn't until my sophomore year of college that I finally decided to end the relaxer phase of my life; it was unfortunate for me to have to suffer through a severe allergic reaction and losing my hair to get to that point. My last relaxer was February 2012 and officially made the decision to become a lifetime natural April 2012. That summer I was working for my school and looked into research & tips of going natural and ended up with doing box braids as a protective style. I went all the way until December when all my damaged relaxed hair was finally gone and then I cut away the scab hair. I went back for another few months of braids until May just when my box braids were becoming a severe comfort blanket.
Ever since then I've been wearing my hair out. I feel liberated to be who I truly am as a black woman. Being able to love my kinky hair is important to me because I feel like society tries hard to change women outside of the European standard of beauty to fit that idea. My hair can be fabulous no matter mood it always stands tall and proud defying gravity and ready to take on anything in my way. I got ambitious in March and decided to try a partial sew in weave and felt like I had to over compensate for my hair not being curly and an extension of my expression. I've been really happy that Carol's Daughter is available at Target and has lower prices so I'm not freaking out when I need to restock my supply. In the near future, I'm still going to be doing hair seminars on college campuses as well as consultations for anyone that needs advice on their hair with any issues.
If you ever have any questions, comments, or concerns I WILL ALWAYS respond back!!
I was born into a West Indian family with the land name of "The Wolf Pack". Why?…because everyone in my family had hair for days. When I was 4 and 5 years old, I like my mother had massive amount of hair that cascaded down my back. I loved how long my hair was and remembered my dad making jokes about my uncle having hair like mine and pressing it for picture day before he sweat it out on his way to school. Everybody loved my hair. My mother however decided she wanted to put a texturizer in her hair to make the curls hang. Essentially she wanted 3c and didn't like our 4a hair. My mom got to a point where she didn't like doing my hair even though it was only once a week. One day we saw a just for me "kiddie perm" commercial and my mom asked me if I wanted my hair to be straight like the little girls hair and I said no I like my hair. My mom was persistent on how much easier it would be to comb my hair and all those age old tales mom's use to convince their daughters it's better. Everyone in my family was against it because in my family hair belongs to the individual not the parents…unless of course you're trying to do something insane. So after that first relaxer it was completely downhill for my hair. The more my mother became obsessed with straight hair the more mine suffered.
Between the first relaxer and the time I got to the 6th grade my hair was 80% shorter than prior to the relaxer. My hair was shedding all over the place and I knew nothing more than my life norm of getting relaxers to straighten my hair. After being harassed halfway through my 7th grade year, my mom's hairdresser cut my hair into a bob to give it some length but then it went right back to breaking off. I felt so plain like I blended in with all the other black girls I went to school with because there wasn't a single girl with natural hair. When I was finishing Middle school I made a bet with my parents that for 12 months I would leave my hair alone and just let it grow out. I went an entire year with braids and Senegalese twists. This really helped me out because I had dance rehearsal 3 days a week and no time or motivation to keep doing my hair. By the time my annual recital came around, I was at the end of my bet with my parents...it was my first time being totally natural since I was 5 years old. I was so obsessed and in love with my hair; it made me feel alive and gave me a since of me as individual...although I was only 15, how would I possibly know who I was as a person anyway. My thinking was that people would be accepting of my hair because I was still me just more free than I was with straight hair; however, my classmates looked at me and squawked at me like I was breaking the norm which I was. The status quo was to have relaxed bone straight hair if you're a black girl and the only girls with curly hair were the Spanish girls. I had none of the knowledge I have now about caring for natural hair; I definitely didn't know about the humidity factor when straightening hair in the summer -_____- After being harassed I tried pressing it one morning before school and it was swangin and as the day went on everyone looked at me sideways and then I went to the bathroom and saw my hair was back to its Afro. I felt amazing about my kinky hair when I was home but the butt of every joke outside my house. Later that year going into my junior year I ended up relaxing my hair because I couldn't deal with being scrutinized by my family and classmates. I went from feeling like superwoman to feeling plain as hell. And once again my hair started breaking off worse. I wasn't bald or nothing but it broke so bad and i had that awkward breaking spot where ponytails usually sit.
When I got to college my hair was the same as when I left high school...crappy, damaged, and short. At one point I couldn't afford a relaxer so I kept growing my hair out and eventually my hair was natural all over again until my family started complaining about it looking "gross" although I was taking great care of it. It wasn't until my sophomore year of college that I finally decided to end the relaxer phase of my life; it was unfortunate for me to have to suffer through a severe allergic reaction and losing my hair to get to that point. My last relaxer was February 2012 and officially made the decision to become a lifetime natural April 2012. That summer I was working for my school and looked into research & tips of going natural and ended up with doing box braids as a protective style. I went all the way until December when all my damaged relaxed hair was finally gone and then I cut away the scab hair. I went back for another few months of braids until May just when my box braids were becoming a severe comfort blanket.
Ever since then I've been wearing my hair out. I feel liberated to be who I truly am as a black woman. Being able to love my kinky hair is important to me because I feel like society tries hard to change women outside of the European standard of beauty to fit that idea. My hair can be fabulous no matter mood it always stands tall and proud defying gravity and ready to take on anything in my way. I got ambitious in March and decided to try a partial sew in weave and felt like I had to over compensate for my hair not being curly and an extension of my expression. I've been really happy that Carol's Daughter is available at Target and has lower prices so I'm not freaking out when I need to restock my supply. In the near future, I'm still going to be doing hair seminars on college campuses as well as consultations for anyone that needs advice on their hair with any issues.
If you ever have any questions, comments, or concerns I WILL ALWAYS respond back!!
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